Thursday, June 30, 2011

Imperial entanglements over drunk driving faux pas.... (or) FUCK IT.

So, I started DUI classes today right? Intake anyway... had to finish this questionaire and speak with a councilor. Questions like "Do you ever drink until you black out?" yes. "have you had unprotected sex while under the influence?" yes. ..."Has drinking caused you to have trouble with the police ever?" No. "out of these 4 choices, what best describes you?" and out of all of them, I chose option "I do not feel I have a drinking problem." SO, she goes we see you've answered a lot of these real honestly, but I'm worried where it says you don't feel you have a problem. I said "my problem isn't drinking, I'm good at that. My problem was getting arrested." She goes " well right here it says you you never had a problem with police". I go "I haven't. I mean I was arrested and everything, but it wasn't really a problem. I got along fine with my arresting officers and everyone in my cell." She goes "Maqybe you should reassess what constitutes a problem to you." LOL... Then she goes "what about here where it says you've had unprotected sex while drunk... you don't think that's a problem?" I go "NO! I've had unprotected sex while sober, and it's not nearly as fun!" HAHAHAHA... She goes "that's not normal, Josh." I go "I'm not normal, mam." lol
So, I'm gonna reassess what exactly my fucking problem is, then....
A) My problem is getting pulled over in Burbank California for having a tattooed arm hanging out of the window while the Dickies "I'm a Cholo" blasted out of a '91 Caddy DeVille with primer spots and Dirty Donny shrunken head stickers in the back and a glow in the dark Buddy Christ on the dash. Didn't swerve or anything, and truth be told, I know when I shouldn't be driving. So it was a pre-emptive and definite profiling sort of situation. Now I'm not saying I think you should drive drunk without consequences- FAR FROM IT! But I'm saying THAT I SHOULD be allowed to drive drunk without them, until I actually fuck up. HAHAHAHAHA No, I'm not really saying that; But I DO feel someone should show visible signs of intoxication in order to be stopped in suspicion of it (my only visible sign was the cop saw me pull out of the parking lot. He was just lurking there, waiting).
B) My problem is that the State of California's biggest source of revenue is DUI's and minor drug arrests. The people are broke. The state's broke. So the state has devised a way to fleece the people it's supposed to represent. It's like Sheriff of Nottingham shit: Tax the people. If the people can't pay, you can jail them and take back the property they've been living on, and maybe MAYBE someone will put something THEY have up as collateral in order to get the jailed person out, and then they have THAT person in pocket and by the balls/ovaries.
C) My problem is, everyone who works in these programs are more than likely in recovery themselves, and have bought the entire BS hook line and sinker. I'm not/haven't. It's only a problem if I want to stop and can't. I don't want or need to. But I enjoy it every coupla weeks. I don't even ever say "Oh I'm gonna have one or two" and then just keep going, because I've never thought 'one or two' to be that appealing. I say "I think I'm gonna get fucked up, tonight", and then I do. NO PROBLEM. Or I think, "Nah- I'm not feelin' it tonight" and don't. NO PROBLEM. Anyway, nuff sed fer now; gotta get back into the blog swing o things again. Thanx fer checkin' it out.